Monday, December 20, 2010

Double Standards

I've been thinking about double standards lately. I had a great evening with Antonio downtown only to come home to Spencer and some girl relaxing on the couch. As Valerie on The Comeback would say, "I don't need to see that!” Now don't get me wrong. I totally respect that this is his apartment too and he can have people over, even if they are super spoiled, annoying bitches. But when I first started dating Antonio, Spencer said that I should hang out with him downtown. He made the argument that the apartment was too small. I agreed based on the fact that our apartment is small. But it seem like the rules don't apply equally. He can have a dumb trash box over, but I can't have my boyfriend over.

That's not the only recent example. Antonio and I went to a wedding on the 10th. I had to ask my boss if would be alright with him if I took the day off. I felt the need to be very cautious with my pronouns. I simply said that I had a wedding and needed to get ready. I didn't say that my boyfriend invited me and he didn't ask. If he did and I had said that the bridge and groom were friends of my girlfriend, no one would bat an eyelash. But, if I said they were friends of my boyfriend, I get the feeling people would think I was pushing my sexuality down their throat. I'd worry that he'd treat my differently. I shouldn't have to keep my relationship a secret. I don't want people to think that my personal life should be private, something only acceptable behind closed doors.

At this point, I don't really care! I'm proud of who I am and I'm proud to have Antonio as my boyfriend. Everyone else can like it or not. But it's still frustrating to live in a world where love is still subjected to such an archaic double standard.

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